Is it just me or are there other women just like me who feel totally at their wits end? Let me give you some background. Two years ago my then 22 year old daughter became engaged. Although she probably could have done it, I planned her September 12, 2009 wedding. Two years! For two years I planned her wedding and by the end I not only felt as though someone was sitting on my chest, I hated my daughter, her fiance, his mother, my husband, my son, his girlfriend, not to mention my mother, father, sister, her husband and her two daughters. Planning the "wedding of weddings" was the most difficult thing I've ever done. But more about that later. Let's just concentrate on today.
I woke up this lovely Sunday morning, as I normally wake up every morning, in sore need of my caffeine. I slept on the sofa last night, as I do most nights. I wasn't mad, necessarily at my dear husband. I usually stay up quite late and I play "Bejeweled Blitz" on facebook, I catch up on my Tivo'd television programs, and I catch a smoke or two in and have a diet root beer. I suppose I could watch TV from my bed just as easily, or diddle on-line, but my husband hates the TV on when he's trying to sleep. He even purchased me remote headphones, but the prince can't stand the light from the TV flashing...so rather than listen to him "bitch like a woman" or act like a temperamental girl, I have taken to sleeping on the sofa. Besides there I don't have to listen to him snore or watch him drool all over his pillow.
So I woke up, made myself a cup of coffee and watched "Meet the Press." By the way, those politicians do nothing except piss me as well. But back to my morning. At 10:30 I was to be at my friend Cari's 50th birthday party. After my two cups of java, I went upstairs and got on the scale. OMG! I've gained 10 lbs. in the last two weeks. Okay, so I squeezed into my dress, grabbed her gift, and headed out the front door.
I'll skip over why it took me 20min to pull out my driveway because my freakin' GPS mapping system wasn't working. I'm getting to the reason why I'm writing today. Cari had a bout with breast cancer over the last two years. She had 40 of her closest friends and family at her party. She gave a lovely speech that made all of us cry. She talked about how she was so lucky to have so many friends and people that loved her. Which is why I'm writing...I don't. I don't have any friends that I can think of anymore. Real friends I mean. My daughter hasn't spoken to me in two weeks over something silly. My son calls once per month when he needs something. My husband...well, he's a "checker outer." He rarely leaves his 10 X 10 cell of an office upstairs. We converse about nothing ever and I gotten so I really don't like him much. Not long ago I made a phone call to my mother and she said, "Lynda, is that you...oh, we were just saying how we "loved" you we just don't like you very much." Uh, okay...LOLOLOLOLOL! That's all I can do is laugh.
So for today, here's what I've figured out. I've figured out that it's isn't them...it's me! How dare I allow them to treat me like I'm a burden who doesn't matter, who doesn't have feelings. So enough! I'm pissed off and I'm writing about it! Wanna join me?
I woke up this lovely Sunday morning, as I normally wake up every morning, in sore need of my caffeine. I slept on the sofa last night, as I do most nights. I wasn't mad, necessarily at my dear husband. I usually stay up quite late and I play "Bejeweled Blitz" on facebook, I catch up on my Tivo'd television programs, and I catch a smoke or two in and have a diet root beer. I suppose I could watch TV from my bed just as easily, or diddle on-line, but my husband hates the TV on when he's trying to sleep. He even purchased me remote headphones, but the prince can't stand the light from the TV flashing...so rather than listen to him "bitch like a woman" or act like a temperamental girl, I have taken to sleeping on the sofa. Besides there I don't have to listen to him snore or watch him drool all over his pillow.
So I woke up, made myself a cup of coffee and watched "Meet the Press." By the way, those politicians do nothing except piss me as well. But back to my morning. At 10:30 I was to be at my friend Cari's 50th birthday party. After my two cups of java, I went upstairs and got on the scale. OMG! I've gained 10 lbs. in the last two weeks. Okay, so I squeezed into my dress, grabbed her gift, and headed out the front door.
I'll skip over why it took me 20min to pull out my driveway because my freakin' GPS mapping system wasn't working. I'm getting to the reason why I'm writing today. Cari had a bout with breast cancer over the last two years. She had 40 of her closest friends and family at her party. She gave a lovely speech that made all of us cry. She talked about how she was so lucky to have so many friends and people that loved her. Which is why I'm writing...I don't. I don't have any friends that I can think of anymore. Real friends I mean. My daughter hasn't spoken to me in two weeks over something silly. My son calls once per month when he needs something. My husband...well, he's a "checker outer." He rarely leaves his 10 X 10 cell of an office upstairs. We converse about nothing ever and I gotten so I really don't like him much. Not long ago I made a phone call to my mother and she said, "Lynda, is that you...oh, we were just saying how we "loved" you we just don't like you very much." Uh, okay...LOLOLOLOLOL! That's all I can do is laugh.
So for today, here's what I've figured out. I've figured out that it's isn't them...it's me! How dare I allow them to treat me like I'm a burden who doesn't matter, who doesn't have feelings. So enough! I'm pissed off and I'm writing about it! Wanna join me?
